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Length: 1:58:32

Hosts: Alex Kate Mitch

Guest: Ben Coughman


Closing Song:

Content Covered:


Other Shit and some Facts:

  • Who's height again Mitch, Kate 5'10
  • 8:25 Dick measuring contest
  • Mitch 6.5
  • Alex 7
  • Kate 5
  • Kate talks about bagged milk US hosts are baffeled

Funny Stories and Quotes:


  • This is Alex and who is this piece of shit.
    • Ben - Ben Coughman.
  • I said faggot.
  • For breakfast I work at 4AM. Mitch (You cunt!)
  • The podcast was so much fun when it was a podcast.
  • My point is videogame music.
    • (33:38)Mitch breakfast - Why don't you have Mela do it? She's your female human slave
  • I'm a 7 bitch.
  • My younger brother called his head of the penis a yucky tomato.
  • Your mom is a whore person I don't know.
  • I stayed up 3 days so I can sleep all through Christmas.
  • I haven't spoken to my mom in 8 years.
  • Mitch stole my Ico Bagel joke
  • You being unfunny isn't going to help.
  • Mitch if you can do anything go to Nowhere.
  • You and I are one peg away from Matt.
  • Take Mitch a joke intended to be funny but its not.
    • Kate - Isn't that hubris or just delusion.
    • Mitch - Stop.


  • I wish Andy died in a car crash.
  • 1.4 GPA
  • Fuck them with no lube.
  • I hate Christmas, I hate my family and I have no friends.
  • We could have 100 fans if we cut our listeners in half. But we would have none.
  • My younger brother stretched his dick as far as it could go and pretended it was a guitar and played the penis. My mom yelled "Don't play the penis! Don't play the penis in the house.
  • At least I'm not stupid, short, blonde, loud, annoying, wear glasses, have no nose, and have no friends.
  • My dick taps out at 5.
  • I had the highest score in Math Blaster.
  • I like to challenge myself.
  • You jerked off in a computer chair slapping a ruler on your nipples.
  • I know the garbageman will open my trash and smell a bloody foul lemon.
  • I've had 10 years of experience putting things in my butt.
    • Alex - You know that story was a bit of a stretch?
  • Where you in Hard Candy?
  • Tony and his 9 inch elephant dick.
    • Mitch - Oh my god.


  • We're bringing it back (faggot)
  • Kentucky Fried Pedophilia.
  • We have as many episodes as letters in the alphabet (What an observation Mitch)
    • Kate - That is very uninteresting
  • I'm a failed clone of Mr. Caffeine
    • Alex - Shut the fuck up Mitch.
  • Had a stupid rock roll joke no one laughed to
  • My problem with Kate is not that she is Canadian not a tranny.
  • Yes Ellen Page at 16 is hot.
  • I'm imagining a man molesting a kid deep fried.
  • What you been playing this week?
    • Alex & Kate - SHUT THE FUCK UP!


  • Everything in Japan is small
  • No Matt is busy jerking off to tranny porn.
    • Kate - Hey I worked hard on that.
  • Rock of Ages is Katamari Damacy with Tower Defense if it makes sense.
  • The ovaries belong in the kitchen where they belong.
  • Why do I make friends with Mitch?

Ben's Mom PC Story

  • PC Printer doesn't work
    • Buys new $500 PC for $50-$100 Printer = $550-600
  • D key stuck/missing on keyboard
    • Ben solution just buy $10 USB keyboard
      • Mom ordered new HP keyboard took 3-4 days $100 total =$650 to $700
    • Mom buys another PC $300 + installed by Geek Squad =$1100 to $1150 total
    • Powercord breaks $100 from HP website = $1200-$1250
    • $250 Laptop bought, redneck stepdad pawns for drugs or something
      • Total Spent $1450-$1500

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